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Self-Esteem

Do you suffer from anxiety or depression? Do you often feel awkward and self-conscious in social settings? Are you constantly comparing yourself to others and feeling you never measure up?  Do you tend to "freeze" if you have to make a decision?

Self-esteem is essentially how we feel about ourselves. 

People with high self-esteem feel confident, centered, and worthy of love. 

People with low self-esteem can find themselves buried under self-doubt and shame. They are often harshly critical of themselves and believe they don't deserve love or praise.  If you're dealing with low self-esteem, you might recognize yourself as having fallen into using one of these ways of trying to cope:

  • Imposter syndrome  You try to project (false) confidence and use your accomplishments to mask your insecurities.  Perfectionists and procrastinators often find themselves here.
  • Rebellion  You pretend to not care about what others think of you. Feelings of inferiority tend to come across as anger or blame. You might even act out by defying authority or breaking the law.
  • Victimhood  Low self-esteem causes you to feel helpless in the face of life’s challenges. You may overlook or underplay your own capabilities, avoid or sabotage opportunities to challenge and learn to take care of yourself, and build your life around relying on others.

Regardless of how your low self-esteem "style," it tends to result in:

  • Depression or deep sadness, or loss of joy in life
  • Anxiety and self-doubt
  • Guilt and anger (blaming others)
  • Difficulty persisting in the face of life's challenges
  • Loneliness
  • Isolation
  • Co-dependency
  • Eating issues
  • Self-sabotage and possibly self-harm

How will therapy help?

The good news is that self-esteem is something that can be changed by learning to change what you focus on, what you do, and especially how you think about yourself.  As a result, you develop a healthier and more realistic sense of self.  

My role is to help you connect the dots in your life to 

  • Develop an appreciation of how your low self-esteem evolved (without getting mired in the past)
  • Teach you techniques and tools to diminish your negative beliefs and critical self-talk
  • Support you in trying new ways of doing things that show you your own capacities and worth
  • Guide you in actively expanding your self-love and self-compassion

Most people developed their self-esteem issues in childhood and have been living with low self-esteem for a very long time.  So the work takes commitment on your part, and generally takes some time - but therapy is not forever!  We work together to get you feeling good about yourself and the decisions you're making for your life, until you are ready to fly free.

Reach out and let's get started.  I'm looking forward to working with you to feel better!